Life is sure different now

by bevludlow on July 16, 2009

Clay Ludlow 4/24/1920-6/8/2009

Clay Ludlow 4/24/1920-6/8/2009

My husband, Clay, died on June 8, 2009, and my life has changed forever; I miss him so dreadfully. Except for a few orders from the web site, and some new custom wholesale work, I’ve barely touched my tools since April. Luckily, I did get some new things made before we realized he wasn’t likely to come home from ICU. Here’s one that was fun to do; an adaptation of a tutorial by Abby Hook.

Fancy coiled and bead necklace

Fancy coiled and bead necklace

Seems nowadays when I try to make jewelry I make more scrap wire than ever before; so hard to concentrate on being “creative.” I’m really thankful for the two new wholesale orders because they’ve made me get back to work. Both are for setting very large stones, something I’ve not done in awhile, so it is a good lesson in concentration. I have a show coming up in mid August and really must get some things made, so hopefully, this is the start of productivity.

Custom setting for 25 mm stone

Custom setting for 25 mm stone

There are so many things that need doing now that I’m on my own, not to mention all the stuff dealing with Clay’s passing, that I find it incredibly easy to procrastinate; after all, these things need doing, so it isn’t really procrastinating, right? I must, must, must get that order out today. Three more stones to set. There, now that it’s written down, it will get done.

Since this blog is “Not enough time in a day…,” my idea for the day is to first wrap those three stones, get them to the Post Office after loading up the truck for yet another dump run, get some food in the house that isn’t fats and carbohydrates, and finally, begin on my second quarter’s business books so I can do the sales tax form due at the end of the month.

Life is sad, but it’s still good.




Latest posts by bevludlow (see all)

{ 7 comments… read them below or add one }

Helen Hill July 19, 2009 at 3:59 pm

Bev, I’m so sorry to hear that you lost your husband and best friend. I don’t know how you feel, but can only imagine what an empty space he has left behind. Hopefully your work, your friends and family, and the Orchid family can help you through your tough times. Keep busy if you can. BTW, your necklace is really pretty.

Paul D. reilly July 17, 2009 at 3:56 pm

I feel your pain, my wife passed away a year ago this past May 7th, our wedding anniversary is coming up next Tuesday. The past year has been a blur to me with some productive time and a lot of very unproductive moments, like this past week has been. The emotional roller coaster is a difficult ride for sure. If you ever feel the need for help through a night try this grief support group: it exists to help widows through our tough times. Best of wishes to you, Paul

bevludlow July 17, 2009 at 11:31 am

Thank you all for your kind thoughts and comments. Memories are not much of a substitute for his touch and his smile, but it is a help that we had so many good years together. Because of our 27 year age difference, we had hoped for 5 to 10 years together, and got 22. I was truly blessed to have those.

It’s good to be getting back to the jewelry. I must be making progress, all 7 pendant orders are done, and I only had to re-do one. 🙂

Beth Wicker July 17, 2009 at 11:15 am

Bev – loosing someone close is incredibly hard – give yourself time. Lean on your friends – that is what they are there for! Your pendant is lovely – find joy in your work. It probably doesn’t feel like it yet, but it will get easier with time. The Victorians knew what they were doing with the year of formal mourning – I think most people do need that much time after a loss like yours. Best wishes.

Jamie King July 16, 2009 at 10:11 pm

I’m so sorry for your loss. I hope you’ll find comfort in your memories, and strength from your art. It’s beautiful.

Laurie Jane Kern July 16, 2009 at 2:27 pm

Hang in there! Remember it’s our memories that allow us to keep our loved ones alive- in our mind, our heart, and with the world!

Hanuman July 16, 2009 at 11:53 am

I am sorry to read that you have lost your friend and husband Clay. May life brings you smiles! hanuman

Previous post:

WordPress Admin